Jay D. Howe

Jay D. Howe passed away at his home in Indianapolis at the age of 81.   He leaves behind his high school sweetheart, Janis (Dole).  He loved her with a fierceness that was and continues to be inspirational to all who knew him.

Jay graduated Shortridge high school in 1957 or 1958 depending on which senior year you want to pick.  No banners were hung to mark his academic excellence.  However, if a plaque were to be placed, it would be to recognize the adventures undertaken and long-lasting friendships created during this time.  When the book of Jay’s life comes out, be sure to read the two chapters entitled “Tom & Jay go to Florida” and “Wolfie & Jay’s Most Excellent Adventure in Brown County”

Jay founded a successful building business in Carmel in 1977 and built over 274 custom homes in the Indianapolis area.  He had a reputation for honesty and integrity and was well liked by customers, suppliers and contractors.  An email from one of his associates later in life captured it well; “Periodically, throughout my life there have been people I will call “angels” who have had a profound impact and shown me how to be better at what I do.   ….You taught me how to be a better person.  It wasn’t necessarily something you said but more of your demeanor, the way you carried yourself, and just being Jay”

Jay enjoyed fishing and was fortunate to be able take dozens of trips with family and friends. He had the opportunity to fish locales like Manitoba and the Arctic Circle, but true to form, his favorite experiences were catching Silver Carp in a Tennessee swamp with his kids.  In a prime example of “practice doesn’t make perfect”, he passed down his lack of angling finesse to two generations of children. But even Jay would freely admit that it wasn’t really about the catching, it was about spending time with people you enjoy.

Tabernacle Presbyterian Church and Carmel Dads’ Club were both fortunate to count Jay Howe as one of their youth coaches. His enthusiasm and positive attitude created an environment where kids could thrive and have fun.  (Notice that there is no mention of “How to have a winning season”).  However, winning or losing, there was never any doubt that “Coach Jay” was on your side. This was especially true if you were a member of ’77 Red Sox Girls Softball team.  You were robbed, and he went to his grave believing that.

His self-deprecating humor was learned at the side of his best friend, Tom Conner, and it was finely honed over the next 75 years. He was never hesitant to poke fun at himself, and it’s fitting that one of his last conversations had us laughing about how his irritable bowels had traumatized one of his adult grandchildren on our last fishing trip.

He is survived by his spouse of 61 years, Janis (Dole), 3 Children; Jamie Howe (Kathy), Jeff Howe (Julie), Jodi Lein (Tim). 8 Grandchildren; Jeremy Howe, Corey Howe, Zachary Howe, Brandon Howe, Ryan Howe, Madelynn Howe, Sarah Lein, Matthew Lein, 1 Great-Grandchild, Cora Marie Howe.  He is preceded in death by his parents Russell Howe and Esther Howe (Humble)

In lieu of donations, why don’t you take a kid fishing?  That would have made Jay really happy.

Please sign the guestbook if you would like to be notified about a memorial service in the spring. To view the livestream of the memorial service, please click here.